Truth-Bombs Dropped by a Little Blue Fairy: How Pinocchio Taught me to be a Better Banker, Leader, Husband and Father

When asked to write an article on Leadership for the FLD, I went back and re-read previous submissions. I was both impressed and humbled as I read excellent strategies on positive leadership, servant leadership, having a strategic mindset, how to be a leader that develops other leaders and so much more. These leadership styles and lessons resonated with me, and I believe in the power behind the principles laid out by these excellent writers. I must admit that I feel a little foolish writing about the banking and leadership lessons that I learned from watching a Disney movie! However, when you are a father of young children, you take inspiration from wherever you can!

The year was 2020 and we were a few months into the weird environment of sheltering-in-place, e-learning for a kindergartner, and trying (but sometimes failing) to keep our sanity! Most weekends we tried to spend our time outside, but this particular weekend was a rainy one, so we baked pizza, popped popcorn and watched a few movies. We had just joined Disney+ and loved that we could go back and share some classic movies from our childhoods with our daughters. Earlier that week we had a little episode of our youngest lying to us, so I chose the movie Pinocchio, thinking it could help us teach her a lesson on telling the truth. As the story unfolded, I ended up being the one that walked away from the movie inspired!

Remember the plot of the movie Pinocchio? I’m not talking about the fancy, new Disney+ version of the movie with Tom Hanks, but the original version? (As a side note, the new version did a pretty good job of staying true to this leadership lesson, too.) Here is a brief reminder:

A lonely woodworker created a marionette and wished (upon a star) for it to become a real boy, his son. A blue fairy used her wand to put life into Pinocchio that night. However, instead of becoming a flesh and blood version of himself, he remained an animated version of a wooden toy. He was able to talk, think and move, but he recognized that he was not real. So, the fairy shared some wisdom with him saying that becoming real is to become brave, truthful and unselfish. For the rest of the movie, Pinocchio’s journey is all about becoming a real boy by being brave, truthful, and unselfish.

That scene with the fairy was so powerful that I paused the movie to teach a life lesson for my girls. However, I realized that I could continue to grow professionally and personally by applying the same principles:

1. Becoming a better leader and banker by being brave – I heard on a podcast recently that the difference between a great conversation and a mediocre one is displaying 20 seconds of courage. I like that because it seems achievable! Muster up the courage for just 20 seconds and have a more meaningful conversation – even a puppet can do that! Reflecting on some of the highlights of my career so far, I see the impact that having courageous conversations made on my relationships and performance. 

   My first leadership role was as a branch manager at a larger bank. If you have worked for a large bank before, you know that so much of what you do and say is scripted, and there is a “playbook” or forms for everything! I vividly remember filling out my form called a “pre-coaching plan” before my first coaching session with my banker. I was 23 years old and she had been the personal banker at this branch location for over 30 years! I had been warned about her lack of performance over the past few years, and that if it didn’t turn around then it may be “time for a change” in the near future. How do you fill out a “form” for coaching in that type of situation? 

   Instead of filling out the form properly, I wrote three goals for my coaching relationship with her at the top of the paper: “Build trust, build a relationship, and understand HER goals.” It didn’t happen in one conversation, but I was shocked at how quickly I accomplished all three of those goals. I asked open-ended questions (ones that were not on the form) and showed that I cared about her and recognized how valuable she was to our team and customers. I learned what her motivations were, and I learned about her own goals at work (not just the widget goals assigned to her).

   Then, I learned a valuable lesson about coaching: when someone gives you the goals that they have for themselves, they actually want you to coach them and guide them to achieving them, even when it means holding them accountable. But first she had to trust my motivations, and me! Which leads to the second part of the fairy’s advice…
    

2. Becoming a better leader and banker by being truthful – Trust is foundational in building and maintaining strong relationships. You cannot earn trust without honesty. Sometimes that honesty is with yourself! While there are countless leadership lessons I’ve learned on this, I’m going to use an example as a calling officer from that first leadership role as a branch manager at the larger bank. 

   At this bank, the branch manager had two major responsibilities: lead the branch and sell to small businesses. As the new, 23-year-old branch manager of this small branch, I had no experience in either of those! However, the fear of getting fired for not calling on small businesses around my branch forced me into action. I set the goal of calling on one current customer and one prospect in my first two weeks at the branch. 

   One of our customers was a large commercial plumbing and HVAC company that had a good checking relationship with us, but no loans. I HAD NO RIGHT TO CALL ON THIS CUSTOMER! I knew nothing about plumbing, HVAC, or even banking if I’m being honest! However, I did know where the best donuts in town were made, so when the office manager was in making a deposit one day, I asked if I could buy a bunch of donuts for their employees and bring them the next morning. I became really nervous when I learned how many donuts that meant I was going to need to buy! 

   When I came by the next morning with more donuts than I could count, I had the honor of meeting the owner of the company. He thanked me for bringing donuts for the whole team, and here’s where those 20 seconds of courage kicked in: I said, “As the new manager, I am setting up meetings with our top business checking clients to review their accounts and see if there are areas that we can do better for them.” I then asked for an appointment with him the following week, and what time of day would be best. To my surprise, he said yes. That appointment was difficult to prepare for as I didn’t know what value I could truly bring to the client, so my goals were just to ask good questions, learn more about the business and the owner, and show that I care. After answering a few of my questions, he ended up asking me several questions too, and I was truthful in answering them. Most of the time I said, “Honestly, I don’t know the answer to that, but I know who to ask and I’ll get it for you.” 

   Fast forward about six months and I ended up getting paid for a HUGE commercial loan that I referred to a commercial lender to fund an expansion of that business (best donut purchase I ever made)! Over my career as a salesperson, I learned that timing and luck are big factors in successful calling, but you can manufacture timing and luck by putting in the work and being truthful. It also helps when you put the goals of the customer before your own, which leads to the next lesson from the fairy…
    

3. Becoming a better leader and banker by being unselfish – When I am at my best as a husband, father, banker, coach and leader, I am focused on the needs of others more than my own. Unfortunately, the opposite is also true; I am at my worst when I’m being selfish. Sometimes the best lessons are learned through heartache and struggles. When I look back at difficult seasons, it was often a season of selfishness. So, like Pinocchio, I now try to focus on being unselfish.

   Here’s what that can look like at work: developing and mentoring others, sacrificing my time to benefit other people, volunteering, sharing great customers with partners, helping people achieve their personal goals and praising people behind their backs. However, even more important is what that looks like at home! Here’s an example of being brave, truthful, and unselfish: I’ll confess to hundreds of people that I don’t know that are reading this article that I have a natural tendency to be a workaholic. When you combine this tendency with the facts that I love my job and feel valued at work, you could have a recipe for a successful work life and a terrible home life. I’ve heard countless times that work-life balance is important, and it is. However, I never want my two girls and wife to wonder where they rank in my life. It took a difficult season at home for me to realize that how I dedicate my time, energy and effort tells the true story of what I prioritize. 

   As community bankers and leaders, we make tremendous impacts in our communities, and we should be proud of that! However, I want the biggest positive impact that I make to be in the lives of those that are most important to me.

While my theological beliefs are broader than the advice that the fairy gave Pinocchio, I cannot help but relate to his journey. So, my promise is to keep striving to be more real and authentic by being brave, truthful and unselfish! 

This Month's Guest Writer

Brock C. Goggins
IBA Future Leadership Division President

Senior Vice President of Retail Banking
German American Bank, Jasper